Off and on Again Read online

  The shower felt amazing, and for a moment he almost felt like purring. He felt startled at the thought of his cat being so close to the surface, but it wasn’t. Relieved beyond belief, Cal finished his shower. He’d eat and then go to bed, and maybe, just maybe, he’d be able to get some rest.

  Derek

  Derek nodded at the waitress who lifted her coffee pot questioningly. She topped off his mug, but didn’t stay and try to chat again, most likely because he’d seen the way she looked at his eye patch when she’d poured him the first one. He might’ve made it obvious that he didn’t want to talk, didn’t want the questions that were going to follow that sort of gaze.

  He had come to the diner because there’d been a free wi-fi sign on the window. This was… he squinted at the view outside. Shit, now he wasn’t even sure where he was anymore. Groaning, he went to Google Maps and let the site map his location. Okay, right, he was in northern Wyoming, because he’d wanted to check out a wolf pack that lived there, see if they’d heard anything, because Derek knew Cal had some loose ties to the place.

  But he felt it in his bones already; Cal and his son weren’t here. It was a dead end, yet another one in the last nineteen months he’d spent searching.

  At first, once he’d realized the Council wouldn’t give him any information—he still felt fucking betrayed by that—he’d spent months calling everyone he knew Cal had ever come into contact with. But no, the cat was gone, and now it was for Derek to find him and his tiny fox son.

  Derek sipped his coffee and wondered where the fuck this sudden stubbornness had come from. He’d never been that kind of guy. He’d been resourceful and really good at talking his way out of trouble, hell, that was why he was here and not dead twenty-five years ago like he was supposed to be.

  He watched the small town outside the diner window and wondered how it would be to have a home he’d chosen for himself. Part of him wanted to go to Oregon, to go check out the town he’d been ripped away from at seventeen when he’d seen something he shouldn’t have and freaked the fuck out.

  He still remembered that night. He’d been driving home from his friend’s place. Damn, he’d been proud of his car. It was a piece of shit old station wagon, but he’d earned the money for it himself by doing odd jobs around his neighborhood and his parents were proud of him.

  Around two miles from home, a few miles outside of town, when he’d hit that stretch of road in the middle of the farmlands that seemed endless, and called for more speed, he’d seen something… weird.

  A car was coming toward him at an alarming speed which made Derek steer his onto the side of the road and slow to a crawl. It wasn’t unlikely that someone was driving drunk or high, because it was in the middle of nowhere and such a great spot to put your pedal to the metal. Besides, some of the teenagers came there to race one another on weekends.

  But then he’d seen that the car was being chased by another one. Somehow, there was no doubt in his mind that was the case. And then first car was close enough that Derek could see the driver, a man. Their eyes met, and at the same exact time, a deer had jumped into the road from the field between them.

  The man, horrified, slammed the brakes, his car swerved wildly as he lost control of the vehicle. It hit the back end of Derek’s station wagon and caused it to spin and slide halfway into the ditch.

  When Derek’s car had stopped moving, he’d gotten out, and to his shock he saw the other car deep in the ditch, where it had hit the concrete culvert under the field’s access road.

  Derek still remembered the panic he’d felt as he ran toward the car, and his confusion when he’d peered inside. The man wasn’t in the car. Instead, a fucking lion was in the driver’s seat, strapped in the seat belt.

  Just as the car that had been chasing the man stopped behind Derek, the lion’s body twitched violently, and turned into a dead man.

  The ping for an incoming text shook his from his memories. It was from an unknown number, but that wasn’t uncommon, neither was the fact that the whole text consisted of one word.

  Finland.

  It was time to do more research.

  Since he’d been working for the council of shifters all his adult life, Derek knew a thing or two that ninety-eight percent of all other humans didn’t. That meant he could get information easier, even without help from the Council, because for some reason, they weren’t very forthcoming in his attempts at finding Cal.

  Derek understood, though. He did. The privacy of shifters was of utmost importance to keep them hidden. Besides, he couldn’t tell them why he was looking for Cal anyway. Hell, he wasn’t sure they would’ve given him details even if he had told them.

  So there he was, sitting on a train somewhere in Finland, heading toward a small town somewhere near the Russian border in the east, and well, he felt a little bit lost.

  It wasn’t that he hadn’t been in Finland before. No, in fact, he felt okay being in a new country where most people he’d spoken to on his way had immediately switched to English when they’d realized he couldn’t speak Finnish. He didn’t feel awkward like he had in some other countries he’d visited on his search.

  The feeling of being lost came from the whole situation with Cal. He didn’t know how Cal was at the moment, but he could make some guesses. Especially with the Council being so secretive, something had to be amiss. Derek just hoped it wasn’t anything too bad, anything that couldn’t be fixed.

  Somehow, he’d managed to snatch a spot in a two-person compartment. There was a full four-person one on the other side of the train car, but for some reason nobody joined Derek in his. He enjoyed the peace and quiet such as it was, and napped on and off for a couple of hours, then went to grab a bite to eat in the restaurant car.

  He felt glad he didn’t have a headache. He’d gotten a lot of those in the last couple of years. Spending a lot of time on the computer brought that on easily, as did driving for extended periods. He still could do both, but he knew that eye strain was a reality he had to deal with now.

  At the final station, he switched from the Inter City train into a slower regional train that was packed to the rafters, to his utter surprise. Derek managed to find a seat next to a young guy who was listening to music with his large, probably noise-canceling headphones.

  Across the aisle from them was a four seats unit with two seats facing another two. They were occupied by a pregnant woman and her two little girls, and one very large bag.

  At first, the little ones kept giving Derek funny looks, and the younger one even pointed at his face and asked their mom something. She seemed to have an honest discussion with her, because the girl then turned back to Derek, smiled at him, and began to bother her sister once more.

  The mother gave Derek a smile, too, but it wasn’t one of those I’m-so-sorry-for-you ones he was so used to. Having a visible disability could be annoying as hell, but so far he hadn’t had any negative experiences here.

  The girls were chatty and kept commenting on things they saw out the window, or so Derek thought based on the pointing and gesturing at their mother.

  He settled down to listen, closing his eyes for the time being. This part of the journey wouldn’t take that long, maybe a bit over an hour or so, but he had a feeling he’d need all the strength he could muster.

  The town at his last stop was small. There was a very long main street and a sprawling center around it, but it seemed quieter than he’d expected. Then again, while doing his research, he’d looked into the human angle of things and discovered that the town was losing people to both natural ageing of the older generations and the migration of younger people searching for jobs that were scarce here.

  It was the perfect place for a farm full of shifters though, and Derek could understand why they congregated here.

  Derek had asked around and somewhat knew where the Jarvela farm was located. He wasn’t a hundred percent sure that was where Cal and Kit would be, but his hunch was that he was right, somehow. The Council had ver
y few places they would trust their most valuable people with. Or, like in this case, the ones that they owed the most. And boy did they owe Cal, whether Cal or the Council members themselves were ready to admit that or not.

  As he walked along the main street, looking for a café, he wondered how to get to the farm. He knew it was at least twenty miles outside of town and that there were no car rental places here. When he spotted a café, he took off his backpack so he’d fit both his body and the pack through the tiny entryway that held doors to both the café and a salon of some sort, as far as he could tell. He placed his pack by the table at the window and went to get his coffee. The guy behind the counter was friendly and immediately started to speak a bit of broken English.

  “Hey, you wouldn’t know how I could get to the Jarvela farm?” Derek asked as he doctored his coffee with some milk. “I’m trying to surprise them, so I don’t want to call anyone.”

  The guy thought for a while, seeming open and not suspicious, which spoke volumes about what kind of people lived here. Derek liked that.

  “You need to find Joonatan at the garage in town. He is friends with Mikael,” the guy finally said. “I’ll make you a map.”

  “Okay, thanks so much.” Derek smiled and went to enjoy the coffee by the window.

  It struck him interesting that there were people of many nationalities around there. One would’ve thought that there would be mostly white people somewhere this remote, but he could see people of all colors walking past—even when there weren’t that many people to begin with.

  “Here.” The guy placed a paper in front of Derek. He’d drawn a good map with some points of interest to guide his way to the garage that seemed to be on the other side of town. “It’s a bit far on foot, but it’s a nice day, eh?”

  Derek chuckled. “Don’t worry, I’m used to walking a lot.” He saw a woman with a head scarf and dark skin walk past the window pushing a stroller, he asked, “How come there are so many African and Middle Eastern people here?”

  “Oh, we have a lot of refugees and immigrants. Not everyone likes it, but I don’t mind them. It’s people, you know. There’s room.”

  The bell above the door chimed as a couple of elderly ladies came in, chattering and greeting the guy cheerily.

  He moved back behind the counter and Derek was left to finish his drink in peace. When he left the café, he waved at the guy over the head of another customer he was serving and got a smile and a nod back. Yeah, so far Derek liked this town just fine.

  The walk to the garage in the industrial part of town would’ve gone faster if Derek hadn’t stopped at some shop windows, the statue of a man who looked incredibly flamboyant in his old-timey way, and the sheer amount of nature everywhere.

  The parks were well-maintained and green, and there were flowerbeds here and there, too. What really made Derek’s heart happy for some reason, was the river he had to cross. He stopped at the beautiful arched bridge and admired the peace and quiet. Small towns. He could remember this kind of hum of distant traffic from his childhood.

  Derek snorted as he lifted his pack onto his shoulders again. Apparently you could take the boy out of the small town but not the small town out of the boy, or something along those lines.

  To his surprise, the parking lot of a small neighborhood grocery store was pretty packed, and he wondered why that would be. There were more cars here than in the bigger market parking lots that were situated on both sides of the main street.

  Someone walked a little dog along the other side of the road when he turned into the industrial area, and he smiled at the lady who seemed a bit startled for some reason. Ah, right. Finnish people weren’t small talkers or social people with strangers. Even smiling at someone like this could be thought of as weird. Derek almost called “sorry!” at her back, but managed not to make a scene.

  The garage was exactly where the café guy had drawn its location. The doors were open and he could hear the telltale sounds of clinking tools and quiet music from a radio from inside.

  “Hello?” Derek called as he stopped by a stack of tires right outside the double doors.

  The clinking stopped, and soon a tall blond man emerged from behind the vehicles.

  “Hi, can I help you?” he asked, wiping his hands on a rag.

  “Yeah, are you Joonatan?” Derek asked, trying to pronounce the Finnish name like the café guy had.

  “Yeah, that’s me.” Now, the man seemed a bit suspicious for some reason.

  “You’re friend of the people at Jarvela farm? I’m here to surprise them, and I don’t know how to get there. I came by train, so I don’t have a car,” he explained quickly, somehow sensing that his window to get this right was short.

  “Who do you know exactly from there?” Joonatan asked, leaning to the back of a car, keeping his distance from Derek.

  For two seconds, Derek thought about lying, but then decided truth was the best policy.

  “Nobody. Or, I’m actually not sure. I know that a man named Mikael owns the place, but I’m looking for someone important to me, and his son. I’m not sure if they’re here or not, but it seemed like the most likely place.”

  Joonatan narrowed his eyes. “What’s your name?”

  “I’m Derek, Derek Lamont.”

  “Wait here.” Joonatan went back into the bowels of the deep garage and Derek could hear soft murmuring soon. Joonatan walked back with a phone on his ear. “Here.”

  Derek took the phone. “This is Derek Lamont.”

  “Hi, I’m Mikael Jarvela. I hear you’re looking for our farm for some reason.” The voice was nice, but with obvious steel behind the words that Derek recognized as protectiveness.

  “Yeah, I’m looking for Cal Calder and his son. I’ve been trying to find them for the last couple of years, and I got a tip that they might be in Finland. When I looked up other—” he realized Joonatan might not be in the know “—places like yours, I realized there weren’t many and yours was the most remote, so it seemed like a good idea to start here.”

  Mikael hummed. “And why do you want to find these people?”

  “Nothing bad, I swear on my own grave. I… I worked in Italy, with Cal. We… we were close, once. But then something happened and we… lost touch. It’s….”

  “In Italy? Same employer?”

  “The Council, yes.”

  “Are you human?”

  “Yes, I am. If you need to check with the Council, I understand.”

  After a moment of silence, Mikael said, “All right. You can come here, but I won’t say anything more than that on the phone. Give the phone back to Joonatan.”

  “Thank you.”

  He listened to a Finnish conversation and then Joonatan ended the call. “I’ll drive you. I was finishing up for the day anyway.”

  “Okay, thank you.”

  The drive wasn’t that long, but it felt as if it took ages. The roads went from asphalt to dirt and then narrower dirt, and Derek found he loved it. What he didn’t care for was the barely concealed hostility from Joonatan. The man was protective of Mikael and his farm, but there was no way for Derek to ask him if he knew what his friends were without sounding insane if Joonatan didn’t know about shifters at all.

  Suddenly, the car emerged from the forest-lined road into a large yard with several buildings.

  “Here we are,” Joonatan murmured.

  “Thank you so much. I know you didn’t have to do this, but… thanks.” Derek hoped his expression conveyed the feeling of genuine gratitude he felt. He got out of the car and grabbed his backpack from the back seat.

  Joonatan turned his car and drove off again.

  Derek looked around, enjoying the quiet and the fresh air. The door to the large, modern log house opened and a man who seemed a bit younger than Derek jogged down the steps to greet him.

  “Hey, I’m Mikael Jarvela,” he said, holding out a hand to shake.

  “Derek Lamont. Thanks for welcoming me to your home.”

  �
�For now,” grunted another man from the porch. He was ruggedly handsome, tall, and muscular, and Derek found himself pinned under his gaze.

  A bigger predator, then. Derek’s lizard brain was used to shifters by now and only reacted to the large ones.

  “Behave, Maxim,” Mikael scolded over his shoulder, then smiled slightly. “I’m sorry for my mate, he’s protective of everyone.”

  “No, I understand.” They didn’t know Derek from Adam, after all. “I’m not here to cause trouble.”

  “You’re looking for Cal? It’s pretty interesting that you just happen to be looking for him when he’s only been here for a few days. Can you explain me what’s going on?” Mikael looked around, then pointed toward the smaller house on the other side of the yard. “The pack house has a nice back porch, so let’s go sit there.”

  It was obvious Mikael wasn’t just letting him inside the houses and wanted to keep him separate from whomever else lived there for the time being. Derek understood.

  He dropped his backpack by the corner of the house and rounded it after Mikael, feeling Maxim’s presence at his back very acutely.

  The view from the back deck was lovely. The lake was brilliant even in the setting sun of the late afternoon, and he could see four teenagers goofing off on and around the dock.

  Derek smiled at the sight. He couldn’t really see details from this distance—something he would’ve been able to do only a few years ago without a problem—but he could tell that one of the boys was shorter than the others by far.

  “Is that Kit?” he asked, before he could reconsider his words.

  “What do you know about Kit?” Maxim half-growled.

  Before Derek had time to answer, there were steps from the side of the house, rounding the corner.

  “Have you seen Kit—?”

  Derek locked eyes with Cal, the love of his life. The moment froze, feeling like an eternity.

  Cal looked at him, his gaze going from Cal’s good eye to the eye patch covering his right eye, and something changed. The energy became completely different, even Derek could feel it with his human senses.